Over Again is a 'No One Else' production. and this song really speaks to me about how much we need God in our lives. He is the center of it all.
First my DnT went really wrong after i did 50 pages of research. and Teacher said i only can get a B4. I'm aiming for an A. wads more, submission date is tmr dear frens.
Secondly, MT results are out.. 'zhi ern, C5.' thats wad the teacher said. A wave of sadness and disappointment came crashing down on me. I wanted to cry. I wanted to protest. I want to wake up from this nightmare. too bad its reality. I studied. I really did. why? i dunnoe.. I put in everything i have. this is the results i have. i may not show it but i really did. I may appear to be slacking, but im already pushing myself.
Over Again
I'm on my knees, I feel like i can't, I can't go on anymore. There's nothing left, I gave it all, I need someone to get me restored.
I'm running to catch my breath I'm reaching out please be there.
Call your name come save me, I know you're out there hear me, As I see your face, Over and over, Through the moonlight burning, Till the dawn is rising, I am longing for you Over and over again.
I need you now, My heart cries out. I'm yearning for something more. I'm incomplete, Unsatisfied. I'm faced down at your feet.
I'm running to catch my breath I'm reaching out please be there.
Call your name come save me, I know you're out there hear me, As I see your face, Over and over, Through the moonlight burning, Till the dawn is rising, I am longing for you Over and over.
I see the scars engraved on your hands, Upon your grace i will depend, Your love consumes me so i can see, that You're all that i need.
Call your name come save me, I know you're out there hear me, As I see your face, Over and over,
Call your name come save me, I know you're out there hear me, As I see your face, Over and over, Through the moonlight burning, Till the dawn is rising, I am longing for you Over and over.
i really need you God.. I'm longing for you..
Joshua praised Jesus at 3:31 AM
Friday, August 7, 2009
4th August
Hi. im very tired now... anyways came to blog about 4th august..=D cos its my birthday and i was really touched by everyone. thanks alot to everyone that made my birthday a very memorable one.=D
i went to school... then after assembly it was Dnt/FnN/Art however, the girls wanted everyone to go back to class first. i was puzzled...i really am and honestly din expect anything. after 5 mins of waiting, the girls came in with a cake and everyone including Mr Lim sang the birthday song for me...So TOUCHED!!!! was a perfect surprise...success=D
Dear 5n2'09 wished me a happy birthday. then during recess, they sand the birthday song very loudly in the canteen for me again!! so sweet of them=D thankyou ppl. and lastly, they blindfolded me, make me wear a hat, tied a balloon to my hand and brought me to the canteem by an alternative route and once again sang the birthday song.. love yall so much.=D the cake they bought was oso coincidentally my fav. so ya, was really touched. even Nigel came to school to wish me. and i gave him a piece of cake cos his birthday was the day before mine.=D
Leon, Gordon and joseph also passed me a present which they bought tgt with danny and heelon. wow, so happy.
went to CO to have photo-taking. also Paulina, Genesis, Tianshou all wished me happy birthday. so nicee of them=D then lastly went dinner at causeway with Eunice, Isaac, Joel, Kahsheng, Joseph at sakae sushi.
we had the buffet dining so can eat more.. when we first ordered, the waitress was shocked. lols... 7plates of this, 10 plates of this and 6 chawamushis...LOL.. eat until so happy=D
so altgt these are the ppl who wished me happy birthday and i really thankyou guy for making my day=D not according to first or alphabetical order. Eunice, Deborah, Joseph(church), Kahsheng, Joel, IsaacSoh, Paulina, Genesis, Tianshou, Weizhan, Huiern, Tsingmin, Debbie, Cassandra, Tricia, Yiying, Shermain, Yekai, Rauf, Johnathan, Nigel, Fuddin, Noella, Jake, Tiffanie, Peijin, AdlerKoh, Phuisee, Caleb Kay, Caleb(brother), Gerald, Heelon, Sheena, Jessica, AuntySheryl, Karin, Adora, JasminChua, Nicholas and my fav group of ppl, 5N2'09=D which consists of, Aslam, Djalil, Khairil, Tajuddin, Jegthes, Xingyan, Nicole, Gordon, Ruoning, Shirley, Danny, Joseph, Hongming, Zhihui, Anisa, Kanagesh, Razmil, Jiewei and Daniel still have MrMicheal, MrLim and the english relieve teacher...lols. yea i want to thankyou ppl for making my day.=D thanks alot.
now i really need to rush my DnT. its going well, but i still need alot of time. ugh...bleh. tmr is joel's birthday, my youngest brother, haha... chubby little pig=D ima continue to do my dnt.. tataz=D
Joshua praised Jesus at 3:08 AM
Sunday, July 26, 2009
The Zone 2009
its been a long time since i posted... well..
YTD, was a memorable day for me. why? cos there was this hillsong concert at Max Pavilion. it starts at 7pm till 10pm.
well, i thought i was going by myself. cos Denise, my cousin, got a ticket for me to go. so i tot hmm, since i had to usher, i wouldn't be able to go with caleb and since i tot that darren will oso be going, i went to church while caleb stayed at home, meeting jedi, matthew and darren.
i dinnoe how to get there, so asked deborah how to, she stays near there.. and learnt that kenneth they all are oso going! so exciting! wadsmore, they are meeting in G2 first! so yess!!! got ppl to go with me.
altgt there were 12 of us. and we bought our food and brought it there. when we reached there, we missed the dance already. and wow it was dark and it was really crowded with ppl inside. O.O!! so we just randomly find a spot at the side of the hall and settled down and just go crazy.. at first everyone was stiff and slowly.... WOOTS!!!! haha, was just singing, shouting and nobody can hear you cept God, cos the music was mind-blastingly loud!! so really had a time of my life there... ima go again next year!=D
haha.. today, had physics tuition in the morning. its the first time i had physics tuition. i got out of bed relunctantly...and was grounchy..LOls.. and had physics tuition... dint turn out as i expected, rather it was a good thing! haha only aslam, djalil, Gordon and XingYan will know.=D haha.
i met them and studied with them till6 and then started chatting... haha=D its gonna be a weekly thing for me, Aslam, Gordon and Djalil=D love all you ppl out there...=D haha i wanna go watch tv already, bye=D OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH..............
Joshua praised Jesus at 7:15 AM
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
The Reporter
................................................ ........................................... .............................................. ................................................. ....... ........ ................ ........................... ...... ................................. .......... ........................ ....... .............. ........................ .................... ...................................... ......... .................. ....... ....... ........................... . ......... ....... .................................... so, businessmen do not report! and neither do reporters do business! Businessmen do business and Reporters, REPORT! ................... ......................... ............................. .................. ........................ ................ ....................... i know your here..... please dun be such a pervert..... if i get scolding from anyone....... im personalising my blog for good.... and who knows wad i'll write then..... to all who are ALLOWED to view my blog=D
Joshua praised Jesus at 5:26 AM
Monday, June 29, 2009
ClassDump
Hello ppl...-.- very sian manzxczx
why? cos its the first day of school? Nah... its cos of my classroom luh...or should i say classdump..-.-
Today, i went into the classroom and guess wad, first impression... its not so good.. firstly cos there isn't any more air-cons.. Next i noticed that not all the fans are on...and the tables were like peeling and producing the powder like dust.. dunnoe how to explain... and the metal of most tables are rusty! so i went to a desk and put my bag down and headed to on the fans.. i turned on the rest of the switches and one fan is not working while 2 others had irritating noises.. noises like as if there are sand inside the fans... sian.. next the chairs.. i went around looking for a better table but to no avail and so i sat down.. i pulled out my chair and there was the metal sound of the legs of the chair... so i look for another chair with plastic covers on the legs... and found one but like 80% of the chairs were in that pathetic condition... luckily i came early to get a good chair...gah!!!
then it was 640am and the clock shows 1045am...-.- it stopped.. Lessons started with 2 free periods and then mother tongue... was playing bejeweled all the way through =p.. after mother tongue was SS and two relief teachers came in.. did SBQs and then recess... after recess, lols... my chair was gone and i had to then sit on the pathetic chairs... nice-.- nvm luh, bless others with that good chair lor..haha=D Next was english? and two teachers came in, relief again... they din teach anything luh... cos they are new teachers, NIE second year teachers in their attachments... then one of the teachers wrote 3 questions on the board... she wanted to interact..-.- how lame? these were the questions: 1)Where did you go during the holidays. 2)What skills did you pick up 3) i forgot-.-
well the thing is, when i saw the second question, i smiled to myself... then like i told Gordon, if ltr she ask you, second question you reply her, Oh! i din drop any skills, so dunnid pick up..LOLS!!!! then if she called me, my answer to second question would be, i din find any on the floor!!LOLs!!! too bad, the whole class wasn't cooperative and so, failed..
then FT came in for CD. guess wad, he wanted to use the projector in the class... yeayea, it is spoiled too!! really a rubbish class... i mean, yea my class could be like the worst class, but still i do not think they shld put us in a "dumpster" luh!!! and like most teachers were happy about it too. I really wonder which teacher really care for my class deep in their hearts... care so much to help us ask why are we treated like that.. izzit cos we're noisy? well, live with it luh... its been like that for 5 years already... laughter is an everyday thing in my class, class 5n2!! well, i have nothing to say...really... for laughing, we get a dumpster...nice!
ltr went to westmall after school with leon. he bought his book, and i got my notebook..=D then headed home.. bought 3 whitechip cookies from subway. when i reached home, i placed a fork in my life!=D share with my two bros, means each of us one or eat them myself. =D yayness, i shared!! dunnoe bout them but i feel good? haha..
overall, today maybe i still need to be more careful with the way i talk. need to really take caution when talking... its like words just fly out and i might hurt someone. need to work harder to control my tongue... yupps, so thats my day today.=D bye ppl=DD
Joshua praised Jesus at 12:48 AM
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Youth Camp G2
This is gonna be an orange post=D
ahaha!!! cos its my group colour luh!!!WOOTS!!!!
we're the Orange Cowboys=D
had this Fantastic Youth camp since sunday till today.
yea was in the group first known as Orange team...
our leader, and members are:
Wenhao(ldr), Me, Sarah, Melissa, Daltone, Keith, Grace, Elicia, And Elissa=D
1st day,
reached church at 3pm.
registered and assembled in praise room..
then we got the rules and regulations part over and got into our groupings.
then str8 away, we played dirty games..
with new groups and ppl you nvr talk to before, its like bobian need to communicate lor..
so got first part to the game, first they had this big sheets that those pasamalam shopkeepers use to cover their stores in the morning those blue colour sheets... ya, we were suppose to wrap ourselves in those and caterpillar crawl across the field and run ten rounds around a pole and spastically run back...LOL
so when the first members went, the commitee had their time of fun by throwing water bombs at us... it wasn't any water bombs, it was water mixed with flour bombs..!!!!
so wenhao went first and he was bombed...aha..
then ltr one by one
elicia was clean, daltone was oso clean, sarah i cnt rmb, but i only know after i caterpillar walk, i din get bomb... its during the running around ten times that i did sth different from the rest...
cos the others they put the sheet down and run, like that easy to get bombed... so i just took the sheet and cover myself and run!!! WOOTS IMBA JOSH!!!AHAHA!!!
BUT TOO BAD, THE COMMITEE they threw flour into the opening of the sheet which was whr my face was and had a good mouthful of flour...-.-
then after the whole team completed that, we gotta use spoons to scoop ice cream and put it in a pail across the field whr the pole was...
my team, i was the runner... lols... yea so i was the one that kept running to the pail and back to get more ice cream from my members...LOLs...
then ltr when time's up, we had to EAT the left over ice cream...-.-
it was disgusting... melted and had some pieces of grass in it at the bottom still have tiny black balls de...-.- disgusting...
so eat finish then went in to clean up..
had dinner with the group and then service..
ltr on we had games at night, actually not quite games, we had to make our banner and a group identity and a cheer=D
Sarah is good at drawing ok..=D
and while the girls draw and colour the falg, the guys were makeing the identity and me? i came up with the cheer=D
cos the others groups names were, Red indians, Blue Kamikazes, Green Ninjas, Yellow knights, Purple samurais, and ours is Orange Cowboys...
now think, wad thing does a cowboy have that the others dun?
well we have a gun!!=D ahaha...
so i made the cheer and this is how it goes:
Wenhao: Pang!!!(gunshot)
Us: AHHH!!!(Frightened and shocked)
Wenhao: Howdy, we've got guns..
Us: And you have none (tauntingly)
Wenhao: We come from the west!
Us: and we're the best( Proud)
Wenhao: Ta da da da da, (tune) Us: PANG PANG!!(Gunshots)
All: Blows guns=D
ahaha... yea and then we had supper and lights out..
the floor was hard that the next day i woke up with neckache... like really neckache...LOLs
2nd Day, wash up, then went down for morning games...
First we did the My name is Joe.
then after a few rounds we had breakfast...
and then wervice... after that was morning devotion with our DG, discussion groups..
then after that was lunch and after lunch was workshop...
Guys and girls splits up cause we are talking about growing up stuff which are personal, like for guys, we discuss the things we dun say in front of girls.. and girls, likewise...yea.
after that we had games... today, we went sentosa!
like ya and we had to start of with four 1.5litres water bottles..
each team starts with 4 and like you cnt lose them.. and we had to run like long distances to the next destination whr we will get another 2 more bottles... so if you dun drink the water, you will be slowed down by the bottles... yea i carried as much as i could for my team to be faster luh... wenhao oso did..
and that day was tiring luh... the bottles had words written on it like Fun, Coolness, Popularity...and etcetc...
the morale of the game was... like the long distances we travelled represents our life...
we're running this race for God in our lifes and many times we want to have Fun and like to stay cool... these are things which slows us down and because of that we might not finish the race faster... so wad we need to do? if we wanna reach faster, its either we drop the bottles which we couldn't and so we had to just drink up the water... we finished 4 bottles i think.. yea.. this is so because in life, we cnt avoid all these things which slows us down. However we can like not spend so much time and energy on it.. so we have to like just empty the bottles lor...
when we were done, our group finished last. BUT its ok cos we tried our best and got to know each other more... plus we all stick tgt and everyone had tried their best so well done guys=D and since we came in last, we were the lsat to bathe...lols.. its quite a good thing somehow since we're the last, then nobody would like hurry us to finish bathing..and so i took my time and i and was really clean..ahaha.
we had service and today, Pastor simon was invited to Preach.. its a sermon i heard before and that is about Jacob... Jacob-means a deceiver and a cheat. He stole his brothers birthright and was running from his brother cos his brother wanted to kill him... after a long time he wanted to meet his brother but the night before meeting, he had a wrestle with God.. he wanted God to bless him and so God asked for his name... and he replied Jacob and he was then blessed... the Wrestle signifies Confrontation and asking for his name is like asking wad are the things he had done... and Jacob Confessed.. Pastor Simon said with Confession comes Healing... and so he was blessed...
Next was night games.. this night game today had a few stations and objective was that we had to go to those stations and try to win stickers... group that wins the most stickers win... Ya so i went first to elissa's station and i needed to clean up the carpark to get my sticker, so not worth it.-.- then i went to the dart throwing station... they had pictures of the commitee's faces up there and we had to like hit the faces to get 2 stickers and we get 5 throws... next went to matthew's station. His station he has a box and he put his hands into the box from below and you have to throw as many number of balls in in 1 min. every five balls 1 sticker.=D i got in 20 but elliot came at the last min and knocked it out and so i only got 3...zzz aha then went to throw darts at his face. =X lols... then got 6stickers ahaha.... there was a record breaking station which we have like to break record luh... for in 1 min how many situps, or how fast you can drink 1.5litre bottle of water and holding your breath.. i broke the holding your breath record by 3 seconds got 6 stickers? ya.. then had the marble trouble station. there were 2 bowls then gotta pick marbles with chopsticks and put them into the dry bowl... got 3 stickers for that...
at the end there was the morale which i wun tell cos ltr ppl dunwan play next time..LOL... it really troubled me luh after the morale was told...ugh!! then supper and nights=D
3rd Day, wokeup and did morning exercise... Jake was leading and todays game we had to find a partner, dun care your gender cos in the end you might be holding on to a person of the opposite sex... so yea we had to hold hands and then there was a catcher and a runner... the runner has to run from the catcher and if he wants to stop, he has to go find someone hands to hold then the other person holding on the the persons hand must run now... and so ya it was fun watching them run =p
ok then we had our breakfast and service... and after that lunch and workshop!!! its about addictions and Kenneth told us his life addictions and yea.. he researched on dota!! He said if you buy a guinsoo for ursa, and you guinsoo the opponent and empower then your furyswipes does 2x the damage... and after that, we had games...
today our game was de den... we had a boxman... and keith was the boxman and then we had to protect this boxman from the commitee. cos if they touch the boxman, the boxman will have to go to the dungeon and the team must stop wad they are doing and go rescue their boxman..ahaha...
everything was alright till the entangling station... we had to like hold hands or another person not standing next to you and then twist and turn and form a circle... first circle we got a knot... second time we had 2 circles...lols.. Me, Sarah, Wenhao and elicia, and Keith, Grace, Daltone and melissa. LOLs... wah and then, you see sarah those quiet quiet type... during that game she was like.. ok you go under and your hand go behind him and blahblahblah... she was like the brains during that section...LOL... spent alot of time on that section and in the end we had 50 plastic bags...
then next part was the final showdown... we had to fill the plastic bags and then go out to the field and each team has a spot and the box, was like their territory... so objective was to try to throw the water bombs into another teams box... and when the game started, sarah, me, keith, elicia, daltone and melissa was drenched in 1 second...LOL i was protecting the box mah and so got bombed on the back many times... then melody from the red indians she threw a water bomb and hitsmack straight into my face luh... not once, twice...-.- the second time she threw my specs flew into the box and the plastic bag was left on my face... at least it din go in to the box... so i saw a water bomb on the ground and i took it sprinted to the red indians box and threw it in... they were like all out attack and no defend...LOL... in the end we had like 3 plastic bags in our boxes while the redindians had like 17...LOL=D so we won luh and we were the first to bathe... it was oso good cos you can have like the whole toilet to your group only and dun have to worry about others rushing you still..
and then dinner and service... it was on samson and how he won his external battles but lost his internal battles... next was games again and we had to travel to CCK park and play it there... we were the first team to reach cck park and had to wait for the rest... Again Sarah was like oh this place, its there and it there and blah blah... why? cos her house was nearby so she knew that park fairly well... and then we played till we had 9 clues and then we had to stop cos it started to drizzle and then we went back to church... ltr we had a debrief? in our group like first to see if anyone pissed someone elses off or not... and i was so cranky at that point of time, i said sth and keith heard it and go confronted daltone...and in the end it was settled but i knew it was my fault... i wanted to apologise luh but keith started crying cos he felt he din do his best... and so we comforted him... and i still hadn't apologise... So sorry for that conflict... to my group if ever anyone comes by here...
and then we had supper and everyone had to find this treasure thingy... but we were comforting keith and so we were again the last but hey, who cares? Personally i think, a team member is more important then winning or losing.. keith was great luh.. he was my motivation during the game at cck park...goodjob keith=D
then went to clean up and then sleep le... 4TH Day, neckaches, backaches, thigh aches and a numb hand...
washed up and there was no morning exercise... breakfast was macdonalds... and then service... and then we got back to clean up the dorms and toilets and i got everyone's contacts and those new friends i made. then said our goodbyes and went home relunctantly... for me... i still want camp...): lols... sorry, then i had to carry my bag and sleeping bag and shoebag all the way home... it reminds me of the sentosa game but its not bottles now, its the bags and they're like 10x heavier...ugh.. reached home and i lie str8 on the sofa and it was like THATS SO MUCH BETTER!!!!! suddenly can feel all my aches...AHAHA!!!
and so once again, thankyou to the commitee and even though the games were dirty and tiring, i still love yall cos youths are suppose to do this kinda thing... ahaha!!! and to my Orange Cowboys, Love you too=D PANG!!(Blows gun) ahaha!!!
thats my time at the Youth Camp... Missing everyone now.. goodbyes=D
Joshua praised Jesus at 6:52 AM
Saturday, June 13, 2009
a week of reflections and a conversation with jeanie
one week has passed=D haha yea many things happened and mostly were bad things... my last week was spent alone. parents are overseas rmb?
i'm feeling fortunate to have some good frens to accompany me and to save me from the boredness. thanks ppl =D
however, even though i have been desperate to go out, wherever i was, i was reflecting. when on the bus, walking, eating, in school and etcetc.. reflecting on wad?
Well, some of the things are about my actions. well i suppose is most of the things i reflected about are about my actions and the rest are about my behaviour. during the week of reflecting, i found out i have been rather impatient, quick to anger and rough...? and its not a good thing... feeling quite dissappointed about myself now. before my parents went overseas, we had some conflicts. Leon, Gordon and Heelon all agreed that it was their fault, and that they would do worst things if they were in my shoes. That means im right. well after thinking about it over a hundred times, i also think im right. Why? Because it was clearly their fault. Esp my mum.
But, thinking back, there was this uneasyness in my heart... as if it was going against my thinking... i guess it was the holy spirit.. because it also gave me a thought on how i shld have reacted. and i was enlightened at why i was wrong... it was due to my actions... Word of God said to submit to authorities.... I find that i have been running dry...in my spiritual walk with God... all my empty promises...and white lies i made to him... Please forgive me...
not only about this but about Arts Night too... my previous post on that band guy.... its proof that im impatient and quick to anger... i will not remove that post to remind and shame myself of my actions and to also change and learn from it, for the better...
Ytd i also had a conversation with Jeanie, my regional leader. I learnt quite alot from her. Many things which i though would be okay for teenagers like us to do. Like getting a stead now? She said things that made me think.. and ya, i feel like i, myself, am not ready for it even though i can claim to love that girl so so much...however its just not time yet.. Thanks Jeanie for that conversation. She made me think like a grown up. like she gave me a little peek at myself from the eyes of adults... and it was amazing and made much more sense... so thanks once again to Jeanie=D
thats my week... i'll change ppl, i promise that! To you, to God, To myself... I will change from today onwards.. goodbye(:
Joshua praised Jesus at 5:17 PM
About Me
JoshuaNg
Singaporean. R-ager
4thAugust 1992
16 years old
UsherHead.Percussionist
jo-shuang-ze@hotmail.com